The Funeral

[Murduck]

~ He walked down the cracked, dirty pavement, overlooking the rustic, tall apartments and old buildings that towered him, cloaking him with their cast shadows. He stuffed his hands in his trouser pocket, feeling himself grow more and more angered. ~

She can't be gone. She can't. It isn't real. Please, God, it isn't real. It can't be real.. This isn't the truth.. it's not.. It can't be..

~ The thick fog surrounded him, and he felt a cold, lonely chill run up his spine. Just a breeze, he thought. He shrugged, and thought to himself..~

Life is shit. Move on. Forget it, and move on as quick as you can. There's no reason to mourn for someone who's in a better place than we are..

~ He bit his bottom lip, feeling colder and colder. It hurt so much. He didn't want to hurt any more. He didn't want to accept what happened. He couldn't. It never did...~

She can't be gone... I didn't even see her.. I never got to...

[Lissachoa]

*suddenly wraps my arms around him from behind*

[Murduck]

((...she's a fast walker for a pregnant woman.. o.o ))

~ The warm embrace felt familiar. He stood still, placing his hands on hers, pushing them away. He rubbed his arm, gazing at the ground. ~

She's not gone..

[Lissachoa]

(( I could do almost the impossable with a 6 pound baby in me ^_^ ))

in a way, no, shes not.

[Murduck]

(( like the hulk! ))

~ He shook his head, gripping to his jacket..~

No..No! She's not gone! Don't be stupid, she's not gone!

[Lissachoa]

(( you wont like me when I'm angery! ))

*walks infront of him, placing my hands on his arms*

Murdoc, calm down.

[Murduck]

I CAN'T, alright??!

There.
That's the truth! I'm scared out of my wits, and I just can't..

[Lissachoa]

I already know that, we are all scared about what has happened and there is nothing we can do about because it has already heppened!

*lets him go*

I'm terrified myself, after you mentioned what if the same thing could happen with our own to me...

*shakes my head*

I have letted my guard down many times, always thinking I can hold ground to myself without anyones help but in the end I just fall over....I say things to keep my hopes up but everything else fills with doubt...





((I'm going to bed, see you in the morning))

[Murduck]

~ He couldn't bare the very thought of them suffering the same faith as his own daughter. The poor man could barely think. He felt so cold, lonely and numb, without the time to mourn. He found himself unable to mourn. He couldn't handle the pain. It was fuelled with hatred, the vivid memories that played in his head like a broken record, the years of toil and suffering...the years of hiding. He couldn't mourn. He didn't know how to... It was beneath him.

Then, something within him snapped. A long gap of silence passed.

He shook his head, thrusting his hand down his pockets, his heart hardening and heavy. He looked up at her, straightening himself up.

With that, he caged himself. He didn't feel the pain, any more. Nor did he feel remorse or sympathy. Bitterly, he murmured. ~

Then, that baby's as good as dead.

~ He was colder than the crisp, icy wind that blew through them. He turned his back at her and walked off. His heart was hollow and black like coal; Almost dead. Joseph won the war, in the end. ~

[Dark]

~:In the same way James was feeling the same thing except it was 3x over. It was basically impossible for him to fertilize children and the 3 rare shots he had at it was gone. 3 Shots, those 3 wondrous bundles of joy in his life had no been diminished to ash. And even though Michelle was not his child, he felt murdocs pain as well. She was a great role model for the younger ones, how they looked up to her so.
He didn't treat her any different than his own and included her in everything they did yet gave her the freedom to do as she wished.
They didn't hug much ether but when they did, he cherished it.
Kevin was his first child. He was so proud of him and his achievements. Kevin was a smart brave young man and he did everything his father said.
He was going to miss how Kevin joked about stuff or how Michele locked him in the cupboard when he was being naughty but he was his first and loved him every day.
The Twins were the youngest of all; one girl and one boy. They were quite but mischievous in secret. They also liked to cause trouble but their company just made the grounding of their family.

In his eyes he had everything. A beautiful wife and 4 gorgeous children. ... What more could you ask for?:~

I'm going to miss them too...

~: He gave one last prayer as the dirt enclosed over the grave, the cloud of dust floating into the air as he pulled his black tentacles back into his body. He held both of his arms around lissa and closed his eyes.

How he dreaded this moment so..... :~

[Murduck]

~ He disappeared within the streets of the lonely city, leaving Lissachoa isolated, vulnerable, and to fend for herself. He needed to think. No. He didn't want to think any more. Not that he could. Those years of hiding behind his clouded, tired eyes took its final toll. He always found a way to hide himself, no matter how hurt or angry he was, or scared.

He cast his empty eyes up at the dead, clouded sky. There was a large gaping absence within him. He saw nothing, and he felt nothing. It was nothing but an empty void, that could never be filled to its brink. He thought he was happy, but it was going to take so much more than that. ~

My baby girl..

~ He clutched his chest, looking down, feeling a lump in his throat..~

[Dark]

~: As he felt his body go cold he thought to himself. What if there was no other chance at giving life?

That sick bubbling rose in his stomach like tasting what little food he ate the day before. His face burned frozen as his bod trembled. His fingers seemed numb and the dryness in his throat was unbearable. His stomach felt as if it were doing somersaults over and over again ,gurgling and rolling over itself, it hurt. His heart most of all felt the worst pain. Like someone prodding it with a hot white iron and twisting, the sensations in his weak form just made him even more unstable.
His mind raced through its thoughts and kept back flashing, showing him the horrible and unearthy images he wished he could forget.

Not knowing what to do he just clung onto his wife, his mind that he was sure of was now on the brink of mental collapse. He just let out a kind of whimper and shut his his eyes tighter.

No man should have to bury his children. :~